Michael Jackson “Earth Song” an insipid mess.
I stopped watching the Grammys a long time ago; before I started earning a living as a recording engineer, before a label insider told me what I had long suspected: that the entire thing was rigged like a Cuban election. I stopped watching simply because it was too painful to see what was so obviously a giant marketing event that bore little resemblance to what it was supposed to be: an awards show for musicians that deserved to be recognized.
I was reminded of all that last night, when I tuned in three times, for about 5 minutes a shot. The first time I tuned in, Taylor Swift was accepting one of the four awards she was assigned by the labels won, and actually thanked her record company for letting her write every song on her album (uh, yeah, thanks). I suppose that it shouldn’t surprise me that music has become so formulaic and machine-driven that singers actually feel it’s necessary to thank their record company for “letting” them write music on their own album, but it still makes me want to puke.
But then we learned that not only are the songs she writes a hearty pablum/Velveeta blend, she’s also a really shitty singer (at least not without, I suspect, a copious application of Auto-Tune). She proved that the second time I tuned in and found her on screen again (supporting my atheism), this time performing with Stevie Nicks on the old Fleetwood Mac song, “Rhiannon.” To say she was a bit pitchy would be like saying downtown Baghdad is a bit fucked up.
If you can stand listening to it, you’ll see that she butchers what I assume is one of her own songs first, then finds complete disaster in the second, with Nicks (fair warning: if you have any cats in your home, I’d suggest you lock them in a room with no humans or other objects you don’t want clawed up). The last song she sings proves that not only is she a crap singer, her voice, when not treated with effects, is incredibly annoying.
Then I made the mistake of tuning in one last time (actually, this one was by accident; while I was popping in the DVD of Deadgirl the TV blipped to CBS). Lionel Richie was introducing the 3-D presentation of Michael Jackson’s “Earth Song” performed by a whole bunch of singers, the entire list of which I’m too lazy to look up (I do remember that horrible Celine Dion being among them though).
I doubt anyone else will say it, so let me: that song, in fact the whole presentation, sucked. It was silly, it was trite, and it was boring. It was also grammatically incorrect:
“What about all the dreams that you said was yours and mine?”
Please. But when Usher bore down with every bit of love, and soul, and drama he could dig up and delivered the lines:
“What about the elephants?
Have we lost their trust?”
That was about it for me. Because if we’ve lost the trust of the elephants, we’re fucking used. They never forget you know, and we’ll never earn that shit back. Never.
You need to write more regularly, because you make me laugh every day. Now, when you write, you make me belly laugh, too. That elephant comment made me almost tear up!
xo
That was hilarious! I wish I had a more profound way to express this, but I don’t. Glad I’m not the only one that feels this way. I’ve always also had a sneaking suspicion that the whole Kanya West shooting off at the mouth at TS’s expense was orchestrated. I wonder what’s the going rate is for making an ass of yourself is? It may not have been orchestrated, but it seems so… I defy anyone to say that it hasn’t boosted her popularity.
Her voice and music are very mindful of the 3rd grade Follies production I was a proud performer in. Thank god I never pursued a musical career! I can imagine the REAL singers of the past wondering how the excitement and joy they gave us, evolved into boring, lifeless and embarrassing slush!
oh, hellz. what did stevie nicks do to deserve that? as if having her own song butchered wasn’t enough? she was forced to sing teeney bopper pop? seriously. there had to be someone with a live bomb right behind her.
(also? the elephants? laws)
TOTALLY AGREE!
Thank you for being so brutally honest!
Forget thanking the record label for letting her write her own songs… Taylor should have been thanking Kanye for letting her accept her award this time
I really enjoyed that. I don’t think I have ever watched the Grammy Awards, so I have never thought about it being fixed or not. I try to stick to the important award shows, “Best Root Vegetable”, or Veggies as they are more commonly known and the coma patient awards, ironically also called the Veggies.
I refuse to watching anything with Celine Dion in it, or remotely near it…and I say that as a proud (read: indifferent) Canadian.
I’m also proud (this time not so indifferently) to say that I’ve never heard Swift sing, and I don’t think I’ll let you tempt me into clicking on that YouTube clip (despite your skill wielding your sharp wit).
I must confess. I love Taylor swift and now I feel ashamed
I’ve just tuned into my last Grammy Awards show. It sucked. Wouldn’t you think Taylor Swift, or somebody within her inner cirle, would have realized that she cannnot hold a note. BRUTAL vocals! The Awards show has become such an obvious farce. It is truly embarrassing to watch. I had to just shut it down..There are some great artists out there but we didn’t see too much of tha this year. Condolances to Stevie Nicks……that song has been forever tarnished.
It was sad to see Stevie Nicks sing a stupid teenie bopper song. I’m not a fan of Swift b/c the lyrics are very juvenile & she sounds kinda bad live. The grammy’s annoy me b/c so many great artists out there are passed up for crap-The grammy’s should be ashamed for putting on a funky show. Honor the real talents & don’t make the viewers suffer.
I LOVE Taylor Swift! So what if all of her performances arn’t perfect!? She’s only human.
Aren’t perfect? Did you watch the clip?
No excuse
thats just it all her performances are bad. Shes trying to do it all sing, write songs, dance crazy on stage… she doesnt have much talented she only writes pathetic songs that teen girls go through but I’m pretty sure shes exaggeratting in some of her lyrics
For example: “Should’ve Said No” Swift writes “You shouldn’t be begging for forgivness at my feet” Honestly, what guy would beg at a girls feet if he cheated on her it means he did’t like her so why would he want her back?
Hilarious
My god. I didn’t see the grammys, but I heard how bad she sucked when someone mentioned it on the radio, so I had to google it. All I did was google, “Taylor Swift sucks on grammys” and I got a TON of results. You were spot on about her performances. She is terrible, and I’m not sure why she has so many fans. And seriously, was it just me or did Stevie Nicks seem very annoyed?
I think mortified is more accurate.
vote for carrie underwood for eoty acm 2010….taylor sucks
Taylor Swift has no talent what so ever,and I don`t want to hear that she is only 19.My God people, talent starts at age 3. She is another Fabian. Good looking,but nothing else to go with it. she should quit while she is ahead in the game. Sorry, but that my opinion!BUT WHAT THE HELL DO I KNOW?
i guess the real question is..who sucks worse swift or her equally talent challeged bff miley cyrus?
100 percent agreed. Sympathy can’t mask the fact that she sucks to the core. I even came up with 10 intelligent reasons why she sucks. Could anyone come up with why she doesn’t? “Don’t be mean” is not a reason.
Exactly. Well said.
OMG keep writing! Write about the MTV awards this year! You know, where they honored and nominated all the autotoned singers! And then where they got all the top BB hit singers to sing live! Well, that is, try to sing live! I gotta say, Eminem is the only one who actually sounded like his recording,then lets talk about Rhianna butchering her part! Then can we talk about that hit wonder Kesha presenting and to think she was actually nominated! Ya, guess the industry wants us to choose her for our next big thing, too bad she has no star quality whatsoever, can’t sing, can’t dance but oh ya, she can do cartwheels on stage, well, clumsily but she does them and she can throw peeps down on stage! Ya, that should take our minds off the fact she has absolutely no talent! If anyone can honestly name one act that sounded good that night I am willing to listen because maybe my ears need cleaning or something! Ya, keep writing! I enjoyed this piece where someone actually told the truth!
Well thanks for the encouragement. I’ve been a bit buried with other work lately, and BITF has certainly suffered.
I’ll try and get back on track asap.
thank you! i think she represents a new low point for music, where blandness and inoffensiveness are mistaken for quality. i have always believed the only reason someone should create at of any kind is because they have something burning inside that they have to get out. unfortunately, thanks to crap like american idol, music is now made, more often than not, by people trying to make a “product”. while we can talk about her weak voice or bad lyrics, to me her biggest flaw is the cookie cutter-like blandness and lack of originality in her songs. they are so concerned with being accessible that you can practically guess each note, lyric, and production move before it happens. worse than being a bad singer or lyricist, she is something much worse… she is insincere. her music comes not from a place of emotion, but is only concerned about being as unchallenging as possible… and yet, she wins awards. screw her.
guys, you know what.. this is not taylor’s fault, so dont bush around her..
the one who made fault here is the one who backs up and continue patronaging to her songs.. they’re the one who bought the albums, requesting it to radios, etc.. grammy is not for those singers who really can sing better LIVE OR WHATEVER!! grammy belongs to those artist who auspice and nothing but love by the people!!
I was already aware of the ‘fixed’ nature of the grammy ‘awards’ and the formula of popularity that dictates the sound of almost all modern music. These points cannot be repeated enough. Everyone just deludes themselves into thinking it takes talent to reproduce the same sounds and lyrics that have already been recycled countless times.
It’s nice to hear someone with an understanding of musical theory explaining (for the children) why this hardly qualifies as music.
It’s just all rubbish. Not only that, she looks vapid and seems incredibly slow and dim-witted. I find her very annoying.
Of the three…Katy Perry, Lady GaGa and Taylor Swift…Swift is THE WORST SINGER LIVE. Probably one of the worst I’ve ever heard. Lady GaGa comes in a close second with her nasally man voice. I mean how can she not be nasally…have you seen the size of that honker? Also…there is nothing more pathetic than a “singer” trying to mimic a song live that has TONS of computer effects on the voice. They just come off sounding like shit. Lady GaGa always brags that she doesn’t lip sync. Well ya know what, bitch? You should! Katy Perry at least sounds close to her records live. Well it’s because her recorded voice ain’t that great so it’s not a far stretch. At least she’s nice to look at, however. They other two…a hoofer and a bean pole!
I can barely stand Taylor Swift. She’s nothing more than a corporate created star who really has no talent and her voice is auto-tuned to death. She totally sucks live and stands on stage like she has a pineapple up her crotch. WTF? Close your legs girl, or do you need to air out the funk? I want to vomit every time I see her.
I’m so sick of media blowing up some half-wit star with little actual talent. It’s as annoying as when “popular” musicians win Grammy’s even though there are far more talented artists out there. It’s just that they didn’t get the airtime or popular media bump. Justin freakin Bieber beats artists like; Fun, The Young Giant and Gotye? The fact that he or Taylor won any Grammy’s at all is proof positive the show is rigged. Who the hell can’t write Baby,Baby,Baby a thousand times and put it to music??? It’s all about popularity, not talent. I cant for the life of me figure out why Taylor or Justin are hits, other than they make tweens dribble.
I suppose it shouldn’t suprise me, we are talking about a country that put the Kardashians on TV and made them a hit. The more talent-less and shallow you are the more the uneducated American public gobbles it up.
I like Taylor Swift, but after listening to videos of her singing from 2007 til today, I am baffled as to how and why she made it big. There have got to be thousands of females out there that want to be famous that sing better than she does. I mean, if it had been me on stage sounding like that, I would have been embarrassed. It seems like she got pushed into the forefront from Day 1. Now she’s super rich. she continues to give tribute to the devil on stage with the very recognizable hand signs used by many in the industry. I think she signed her soul away for fame.
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