I was at Walmart recently, shopping for cheap hot dogs or something, when I noticed a rather disturbing trend: meat flavored chips.
Oh sure, I’d seen the Doritos “Late Night” series of chips, but the end cap stocked with Herr’s new “Kansas City Prime Steak Flavor” and “Baby Back Ribs” chips put me over the edge. I shot a cellphone picture of the display thinking it deserved a mention, but realized that a bit more was required.
If meat flavored chips are going to be taking up this much space on store shelves, I figure it’s my duty as The Meatist to at least give ‘em a taste, if for no other reason than to prevent any of my readers from wasting money on crap.
So I scored a bag of each of the Herr’s chips, both of which are marked “artificially flavored” so that people don’t think they were actually rubbed with ribs and steak. I also bought a bag of Doritos Cheeseburger (which is just weird) chips, and a tube of Pringles Blastin’ Buffalo Wing chips to find out just what’s going on here. And to keep things interesting, rather than write each one up, Joanna suggested that she shoot a short video of my reaction to each one. Which brings us to The Meatist’s first video review.
Random comments from other testers appear before each video.
Herr’s Kansas City Prime Steak Flavor
“They don’t taste like steak, but I really like them.” – Desmond, my nine-year-old son
“Really good, but doesn’t taste like steak at all.” – Zane, a nine-year-old guest
“I wasn’t going to puke, but I’d never buy them.” – Joanna, my wife
Pringles Blastin’ Buffalo Wing
“I love them. They aren’t that spicy.” – Desmond
“They are if you eat two at a time.” – Zane
“Not awful at all. I kinda like them.” – Joanna
Herr’s Baby Back Ribs Flavor
“Tastes like barbecue sauce. Pretty good.” – Desmond
“Just throw them away.” – Joanna
“Oh shit – I’m ashamed to say it, but I really like these.” – Joanna
“Those Cheeseburger Doritos are awesome!” – Nina, my 13-year-old daughter
“I don’t like them. Sorry.” – Desmond
“Oh my god, they taste like a hamburger” – Zane
Bottom line: None of these will satisfy a meat jones, but I never thought they would.
Although I’m not a real fan of any of them, at least not in my guise as The Meatist, the Pringles and Doritos didn’t suck for use as chips to munch on in a pinch. The Pringles had a nice spice to them, and the Doritos had a pretty nice pickle/mustard thing going on, “but in a good way,” as Joanna put it when she tried one.
The Herr’s, though, left a taste in my mouth that required a good scrubbing with a toilet brush to remove. Apparently suitable for nine-year-olds, anyone that’s reached double digit age may not make it through more than a couple before getting depressed. Avoid them.