Hurricane Season Brings More Than Rain
It’s hurricane season again (has been if Florida for a while now) which means three things:
- Every television station in the south runs scaaaaarrrryyy promos about the latest burp in the weather off the coast of Africa so that you’ll “Tune In At ELEVEN!”
- People suffering from the whole a-little-knowledge-can-be-a-bad-thing syndrome will be telling us that either a) “This is due to global warming!” and “We broke the earth!” or b) “It’s the end of days people, Jesus is coming and you’ll all be judged.”
- That you’re going to hear way too much of the word hunker in every variation: “We’re gonna hunker down,” “They’ve hunkered down,” “I’m just hunkering down,” “Hey you! Hunker down! Hunker down!” etc.
I’d argue that the first is irritating (though every time they talk about a tropical depression I think of Anna Nicole Smith – ohhh…too soon?) and the second is annoying, but the third is the worst of the bunch.
I hate the word hunker. Hunker. Hunker. Hunkered. Hunkering. Hunkerer. Is it really that hard to think of alternatives? Like for instance, “we’re going to stay inside now,” or “we’ll just keep out of the storm,” or “I’m not going out in that shit, are you kidding me?” or “I’m lashing myself to the toilet in the basement – call me when it blows over.” See? There are four, just off the top of my head, and I’m not a fancy professional broadcaster like Al Roker.