Katie Couric can keep a straight face through anything.
I was called a snob the last time I said that Sarah Palin was an idiot. But if thinking that the following quotes indicate a lack of the sort of….what’s the word I’m looking for…. on-the-ball-itude necessary to be the Vice President of the United States makes me a snob, then I’m the snobbiest bastard I know. What’s immediately apparent when you read or listen to these bits (and they’re both fun: reading and listening that is) is that Palin’s been given a few talking points to use but doesn’t seem to know how or where to use them, or even exactly what they mean. So she spins the wheel of random slogans (c’mon big money! no whammy no whammy no whammy) and whatever pops up she jams into a semi-coherent sentence that doesn’t answer the question.
Both of the following quotes have been lovingly transcribed by yours truly for your reading pleasure. There’s a link to the video I got them from at the end of the post.
Quote number one comes to us from the part of Palin’s brain that spun the slogan “shore up”. It’s her answer to Couric’s question about what the alternative is if a bailout bill isn’t passed:
The the alt…as I say, inaction is not an option, we have got to shore up our economy. This this is crisis moment for America – really for the rest of the world also looking to see what the impacts will be if America were to choose not to shore up what has happened on wall street because of the the ultimate adverse effects on main street and then how that effects this globalization that we’re a part of in our world.
And here I didn’t even know that we were part of the globalization in our world.
Our next quote sadly appears to have had to contend with a malfuntion of the wheel of slogans. Random catchphrases were flung into the middle of sentences where they didn’t belong. It’s like a movie in which the robot that everyone thinks is human starts short-circuiting and saying all kinds of weird random shit. Here then is her answer to Couric’s question asking why it wouldn’t be better to spend $700 billion dollars helping families stuggling with health care, mortgages etc (which could actually be answered really easily by saying “because that would be stupid.”)
That’s why I say I, like every American I’m speaking with, we’re ill about this position that we have been put in where it is the tax payers looking to bail out. But ultimately what the bail out does is help those who are concerned about the health care reform that is needed to help shore up our economy, um helping tho uh….it’s got to be all about job creation too, shoring up our economy and and putting it back on the right track, so health care reform and reducing taxes and reigning in spending has got to accompany tax reductions and tax relief for Americans and trade – we’ve got to see trade as opportunity not as a a competitive um scary thing, but one in five jobs being created in the trade sector today, we’ve got to look at that as more opportunity. All those things under the umbrella of job creation, this bailout is a part of that.
Impressively stupid. It’s like political Tourette syndrome. She just threw every fucking phrase she had ever heard at the wall to see if anything stuck. Health care reform! Shore up the economy! Job creation! Reigning in spending! Trade sector! Job creation! And, of course, reducing taxes, tax reductions, AND tax relief. All three (and in the same sentence!)
This woman has no business running for VP, period. Sure, you can say that anyone should be allowed to run for office (I agree – why, I myself am running for office, just this once) but John McCain had a responsibility to select someone who could actually do the job. Not to mention someone that could take over as President should he die in office. But he didn’t. For me, as long as he was picking someone that couldn’t do the job I wish he had at least picked someone that actually intends to be funny, like SpongeBob. At least he’d bring Patrick along to help defend the borders from the Russians.
Fareed Zakaria put it like this (in the article in which he had the same section I used for my second quote transcribed, and which I could have stolen from him had I seen it before I transcribed it myself thereby saving myself much typing, but I didn’t so I suck):
In these times, for John McCain to have chosen this person to be his running mate is fundamentally irresponsible. McCain says that he always puts country first. In this important case, it is simply not true.
Bingo.
You can check out the original video here.
…and he had the obligation to pick someone who could put words together to form a fucking sentence…..
You are too funny! If only the topic weren’t so sad. Kinda makes you wonder who the genius was that threw her name into the hat of potential VP choices, doesn’t it? Oh, the VP primaries should be FUN to watch! I’ll be there with a big ol’ bowl of popcorn and a batch of margaritas.
Ugh, and the fact that my dad *likes* her almost makes me wish I were adopted…
She’ll probably do ok in the debates actually. She seems to as long as she is coached with data and is allowed to be herself rather than try and jam all the buzz words into every answer.
Plus Biden will have to try hard not to be an asshole, so it could actually go either way. Which doesn’t really change my opinion of her. And don’t be too had on your dad – a lot of people like her.
Instincts man. She has good instincts man. And she could push the button which I don’t Obama could do. OTOH, she might have pushed the button on those pirates off the coast of Somalia. Who are quite funny by the way. They say, “sure we want money, but we’re really protesting the illegal fishing and dumping off the coast of our country. We’re like the Coast Guard.” Love those cheeky bastards. Still, we should blow them the fuck out of the water.
That, my friends, is how you change the subject.
Joe Biden certainly has a knack for memorizing long lists of falsehoods. He’s always been a liar cloaked in wonkiness but last night the bullshit was really on display. I really would rather have an honest retard than a duplicitous deceiver.
You make an interesting point. Far more disturbing to me though was Biden’s face. What was going on there? Looked like he had a boat load of botox and a bad face lift. Looked a little like Carrot Top actually.
Of course, who said she was honest? I don’t know if she’s honest or not. And really, Biden’s bullshit was the same silly misleading stuff that everyone in politics uses. Not really different from the canned lines that Palin was using as I recall. They both used the old “the other candidate voted NO (or YES) on this or that” as if it was emblematic of their position in general.
One of the things I’ve been wanting to ask the Dems for the last few weeks is this: “So DE-regulation under Bush caused the current economic problems? Can you please name ONE regulation that has been dropped or loosened under Bush that’s responsible, and why?” Because there are plenty of people that posit additional regulation like, for example, Sarbanes-Oxley made things worse.
Of course, since writing the beginning of this I’ve seen the front page of todays NY Times, so after I read that I may have my answer.
I was watching it on channel 4 last night when my son reminded me that we had HD. I knew it would be bad but I was unprepared for the extreme level of badness that is Joe Biden in HiDef.
I was listening to NPR this morning and they were fact checking. My favorite was Biden’s claim that we spend more in Iraq in three weeks than we have re-building Afghanistan. Note the slight distinction, all combat operations and rebuilding efforts in Iraq vs. just diplomatic efforts in Afghanistan. An apple and an orange.
Brad,
I hope there are no deates fo you election….otherwise you being an average joe, upolished and un-afflicted with political bullshit, may end up sounding just like her. She has been thrown a lot on her plate, and myself……..I think she is handling better than anyone could. And certainly with more honesty and coonectivity to the common folk. I think she can grow into the job nicely, and be more fair and honest then any of thos slimey scum sucking bastard politicians that have been in power way too long…….as everyone beats up an Palin, we forget abouth the silver tounged terrorist that the dems have proposed to be our President. When did VP ever get so much attention…..it’s like hiring yor surgeon because you like his nurse…..rediculous.
PS: Good luck with your election, we need some more average joes in office to combat all the old time shitbags that run business as usual.
wow…I need a spell check bad….must have been half asleep when I wrote that……
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spongpop